How do I file a restraining order in San Diego
Recently updated on March 11th, 2025 at 08:01 pm
Restraining Orders in California including San Diego are court orders issued in situations of abuse which require the abuser to stay a certain distance away from, and refrain from contacting the victim. Failure to comply with the restraining order can result in criminal charges and therefore these serve as effectively a final warning.
San Diego County
Abuse could be include a large number of behaviors such as domestic violence, threats, harassment, stalking, controlling behavior in range of ways. Restraining orders are particularly suited when the behavior may not qualify as a crime.
There are different types of restraining order and one of the main things that differentiates them is the relationship between the abuser and victim. For example a if the abuser is a current or former intimate partner or dating partner or relative then a Domestic Violence Restraining Order is suitable.
Civil harassment Restraining Order (CHRO) is for situations when the abuser is your roommate, neighbor, coworker, total stranger — or anyone who is NOT a romantic partner or close family member. 
Domestic Violence Restraining Order is for situations when the abuser is your current or former romantic partner, someone you dated, or family member (not roommate)
Elder Abuse: is for situations when a senior citizen or disabled adult is being abused by a caretaker, neighbor or child .
Workplace Violence: An employer (not individual) requests these to protect their employee(s) from a person who has stalked, harassed, been violent or threatened violence at the workplace.
Restraining orders have a less strict burden of proof than criminal cases, highly effective for the victim, and provide coverage against abusive and harassment acts which are emotionally painful but not technically a crime.
Domestic Violence Restraining Orders are free but Civil Harassment may have filing fee of about $435 depending the severity of the abuse.
Restraining Order can be filed by getting a copy of the standard court forms issued by the Supreme Court of California, filling them which includes specifics of harassment and filing them with the clerk at your local Superior Court which would be Superior Court of California, County of San Diego. The forms can be obtained at your local Superior Court, or you can fill them online here and download a PDF copy.
Restraining orders are governed by the California state law i.e. state laws as opposed to US Federal Law. The formal name and fine print of restraining orders varies from state to state but the basic idea is the same: a court orders an abuser to stay away from their victim of harassment, emotional stress, abuse, stalking, cyberstalking, or threats — or face criminal charges.
Precheck: Does my situation even qualify for filing for a Restraining Order
Before you do all the work of preparing and attempting to file the case documents, here’s a summary of the different types of restraining orders and the situations they apply to. The first step is to see if any of the different types of restraining order applies to your situation or is remotely related as that might help you decide whether to apply .
What if I am Under 18 years of Age
Restraining orders can be requested by anyone 12 years or older, and without your parent’s permission. If you are under 18, then in some situations , a judge may ask you to have a trusted adult help you in your case after you have filed for the petition. such as a parent a counselor or a neighbor.
If you are under 18, you can go to your local court’s Self-Help Center for help. For support and safety tips, you can chat at loveisrespect.org, text “LOVEIS” to 22522, or call 1-866-331-9474.
If you are 12 or older and someone has asked for a restraining order against you, you can go to court without a parent. In some situations, the judge may ask you to have a trusted adult help you in your case.
What if the abuser lives out of California
A non-California resident who abuses a California resident may be subject to the state’s jurisdiction. That means that a California court can make orders prohibiting a non-California resident from further abusing a California resident. Abuse committed by out-of-state parties subjects them to this state’s personal jurisdiction.
An act of abuse by a party in another state against a person in California is subject to “special regulation” in this state and is sufficient to vest personal jurisdiction in the California courts over the out-of-state party to enjoin any further such conduct.
Situation Examples
Example 1: Husband is sexually and verbally abusive, and controlling
My husband doesn’t allow me the option to say no to sex, and often that warning is not explicit but I know bad things will happen if I say no such as bullying, threats and immense tension. As a couple we have been having sex everyday for nearly two decades now. He verbally abuses me by calling me a whore if I don’t sleep with him. During this time he is intoxicated so I am fearful of having a discussion as his anger will quickly get out of control, and he will hurl things at home thereby inducing more fear in me. Such behavior has been going on for over a decade now so I am not sure about the date of the first incident now. One day I very carefully chose my words and mentioned that maybe we are not a right fit, and should seek counseling. He was enraged and threated me that he will utterly destroy me, my work reputation, and expose some minor things I did to the immigration authorities. Since about six months, I have been sleeping in a separate room. He comes there routinely and tries to sleep with me forcefully. Often times I feel that if I resist, or decline his advances that my reputation, our property, or even me life will me in danger. I feel little, humiliated and disgusted with myself.
Example 2: Boyfriend blackmails and destroys property to control and induce fear
Today, Michael was armed with a pistol and seemed to be under the influence of an unidentified substance. He made threats to create false narratives with the aim of jeopardizing my 28-year accounting career, stating he would falsely accuse me of engaging in illegal financial activities. His menacing statement, “if you mess with me, I’ll retaliate,” was accompanied by destructive actions, such as damaging property in my home, including creating a hole in the wall. Michael’s behavior becomes particularly alarming when he is under the influence of drugs.
Example 3: Ex-boyfriend stalks
Jenna’s ex-boyfriend shows up at Jenna’s work unexpectedly and drives around. Jenna is fearful, and had earlier clearly asked him to leave her alone.
Example 4: Neighbor made a threat
Margaret was planting tulips along the edge of her garden when she heard footsteps crunching on gravel. She looked up to see Tom, her next-door neighbor, standing on the property line, a shotgun slung casually over his shoulder.
“You need to stop putting your trash cans so close to my driveway,” he said, his voice low but sharp.
Margaret straightened, brushing dirt from her gloves. “Tom, the cans are on my property. They’re not even near your drive.”
Tom’s lips curled into a thin smile. “Maybe. But if I see them there again, you might just find one full of buckshot.”
Margaret froze, her heart racing. The way his fingers tapped the barrel of the shotgun made her stomach churn.
“You wouldn’t dare,” she managed, standing her ground.
“Wouldn’t I?” Tom said, tilting his head slightly. “You’re free to find out.”
Before she could respond, he turned and walked back to his house, whistling a tune that felt too cheerful for the tension in the air. Margaret stared after him, her mind spinning with whether to call the police or try to resolve it herself.
Step 1: Select the Suitable Type of Restraining Order
There are a few different types of restraining orders and typically only one of them may apply to your situation so it’s important to select the correct one.
Domestic Violence Restraining Order (DVRO) is for harassment, excessive texting, stalking, verbally abusing, controlling behavior, blackmailing or causing fear when the abuser is your current or former husband/wife, or a romantic partner, or a coparent, or a family member (not roommate). For a complete overview of what is domestic violence please review: What is the legal definition of Domestic Violence in California
Civil harassment Restraining Order (CHRO) is protect individuals from harassment, abuse, stalking, fear, threats or emotional harm by someone they do not have an intimate or family relationship with, such as a neighbor, roommate, coworker, or stranger.
Gun Violence Restraining Order (GVRO): is for cops or family members to apply for when an unstable person has a firearm, and risks hurting themselves or others. The court order requests firearms to be taken away.
Elder Abuse: is for situations when a senior citizen or disabled adult is being abused by a caretaker, neighbor or child .
(Not quite ready for online filing)
Other types (not for individuals)
Workplace Violence: An employer usually requests these to protect their employee(s) from a person who has stalked, harassed, been violent or threatened violence at the workplace.
(Not quite ready for online filing)
School Violence is for school officials to get when there’s risk of violence against students at a private college or university when the risk of violence is at the on campus.
(Not quite ready for online filing)
Step 2 Gather Evidence (You can upload it online)
The first step is to gather the evidence to support your case. What proof do you need for a restraining order in California. The following are examples to help you organize though anything that supports your claims can be used.
Criminal Case
A criminal case in progress shows that the district attorney also found evidence of the abuse or crimes and therefore supports your claims.
Photos
Photos of violence, injuries, damage
Messages
Print outs of messages, emails or transcripts of voicemail
911 Calls
For each call document the #, date, time, caller, callee details
Medical Records
Documentation of any medical emergencies or injuries or treatments resulting from abuser’s violence.
Police Report
Police reports filed against abuser for domestic violence.
Testimony
A testimony from a witness who can be a family member, neighbor a co-worker or a bystander, either in writing or in person at the hearing, describing the incidents witnessed.
Step 3: Fill the court forms
You can fill these online for for free:
- Domestic Violence Restraining Order (DVRO)
- Civil Harassment Restraining Order (CHRO)
- Gun Violence Restraining Order (GVRO)
In order to apply for a restraining order, you need to fill and submit a specific set of official California court forms. These have questions aimed at understanding your situation and the people involved.
Tip: Check your county’s Superior Court website Or use LegalAtoms to get a complete and updated list of required forms.
Step 4: File with the Court
Filing is the process which means the following steps
- Formally submitting the case documents at the court with the office of the clerk
- The clerk reviews and verifies the correctness of forms and completeness of the required info
- Clerk enters the case in the court database, stamps the documents and assigns a case #
County (Venue)
The proper venue for a restraining order case is the county where you live, or where the abuse took place or where the abuser lives. However, venue is a defensive motion and should be considered by the court only if the restrained party objects by filing a noticed motion for change of venue at or before the time of responding to the request.25 Improper venue is not a proper basis for the court to deny relief on its own motion (sua sponte).
Determine the County
In California, one typically file at the Superior Court at county of your residence or where the abuse occurred. For example, if you live in San Francisco city, then the Superior Court of California, County of San Francisco. There can be many special cases and fine print but that is the most common case. Please consult a lawyer if your situation is uncommon e.g. the abuser is overseas or you are overseas and the abuser is in California.
Determine the Correct sub-location
Within the County of San Diego, there are four (4) Superior Court locations which divide the San Diego county into different regions. It’s important you file at the correct location which has jurisdiction over your case.
The locations are:
Central Division
Office of the Clerk
1100 Union Street, San Diego CA 92101
North Division
Office of the Clerk
325 South Melrose Drive, Vista, CA 92081
(760) 201-8600
South Division
Office of the Clerk
500 3rd Avenue, Chula Vista CA 91910
East Division
Office of the Clerk
250 East Main Street, El Cajon CA 92020
Identify the methods of Filing
Method # 1: In Person by visiting the court house
Your court location would accept the forms to be submitted in person at the court hours.
Tip: All courts have lunch hours when they are closed for an hour
When you submit your case documents at the court, typically you take 3 copies.
The clerks reviews it, and if everything is ok, they formally enter it into the court system and put a stamp near the top of the documents. That acceptance is called filing.
The stamp may look something like this:
Method # 2: E-file online
This is the most efficient option if you have an e-mail address and some basic computer skills like registering an account, and uploading PDF files.
Some counties now have one or more online portals where you create an account for free, and then you can upload documents and hit submit.
You will be required to some online service fees.
Method # 3: Via another person
Some counties accept filing via a friend or legal courier. These companies or individuals charge a flat or hourly fee and file the documents at the court.
Step 5: Judge Sets Hearing, Grant/Deny Temporary Restraining Order (TRO)
A judge reviews the case offline (i.e privately in their office) and then you will be notified by the court about the outcomes which are:
- Temporary Restraining Order Granted
- Temporary Restraining Order Denied
In addition the Judge would typically set a hearing. If the case doesn’t have sufficient evidence it might be dismissed without even a hearing.
The temporary order (if issued) is valid until the hearing i.e. typically about 3 weeks. If the hearing is delayed for any reason, you need to check with the court to ensure the temporary order is renewed until the hearing to provide you with legal protection.
Step 6: Serve a set of Stamped Case Forms including Hearing Notice to Abuser
Whenever one party initiates a restraining order it needs to inform or serve the other party formally by delivering the court documents. That step is called serving the respondent
Under the California law there are multiple ways in which the other party can be served.
You cannot serve your papers yourself.
Option 1: Ask the Sheriff (FREE)
A sheriff or marshal can serve the opposing party for you which is a big help. This service is offered for FREE. To ask the sheriff to serve your papers, you must have an address or location for the other side (restrained person). If the other side is in jail, the sheriff can serve them. If the other side is in prison in California, prison staff, not the sheriff, will serve your papers. Follow the instructions by the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation for serving someone in prison
Option 2: Ask a friend, relative or any adult (FREE)
You ask someone you know to be your server
- 18 or over, and
- not part of your case
Think about safety when choosing your server. Get step-by-step instructions for how to have someone else, not the sheriff, serve your court papers.
Option 3: Hire a courier for legal papers (Process Server)
You can also hire a courier called professional process server. You can search on Yelp or Google to get a list of options near you. Yelp Example . An example is ABC Legal Services.
You cannot hire regular couriers such as UPS, FedEx or US Postal Service unless in exceptional scenarios where the judge authorizes service by mail, but that’s a whole different topic altogether.
Step 7: Present Evidence in a Court Hearing
Attend a hearing: The court holds a hearing within a couple of weeks where the evidence is examined. If there is sufficient supporting evidence as determined by a Judge, a full restraining order is issued. At this point it becomes a crime for the abuser to break the conditions of the restraining order.
Step 8. Collect the Final Order
After the hearing, a final order may be issued. You can take a paper copy of the order with you. The order is typically valid for five years.
Costs
How much does it cost to get a Restraining Order
The cost depends on the type of restraining order.
Domestic Violence Restraining Order
- FREE forms : You can get the court forms for free, or prepare them using the guided experience below.
- FREE filing: There is no fees for filing. Online filing platforms may charge a E-filing fees
- FREE Serving the other party
Civil Harassment Restraining Order
- FREE forms : You can get the court forms for free, or prepare them using the guided experience below.
- DEPENDES Filing:
- FREE $0 If there is violence or stalking involved OR if you have low income and you qualify for a fee waiver
- $435: Otherwise
- FREE Serving the other party
Duration
How long does it take to get a Restraining Order from filing for a Restraining Order
You can get a temporary protection order the same day as you file.
Courts can have a cutoff of around 2 p.m. for the same day service, so you need to file before then. Otherwise, the order would be issued the following day when courts open.
Courts are generally open Monday-Friday and closed on Saturday-Sunday.
The temporary order is valid until a formal hearing is held in which both parties need to be present. Typically a hearing is scheduled in 2 weeks of filing.
At the hearing a formal order may be issued
Is a restraining order helpful?
The purpose of a restraining order is to restrict the contact or proximity of one person (the respondent or alleged perpetrator) to another person (the petitioner or victim) in order to ensure the safety and well-being of the petitioner.
The specific terms of a restraining order can vary depending on the circumstances of the case e.g. if the people live together then it might require one party to vacate the place.
Typically, a restraining order may prohibit the respondent from
- Approaching or contacting the petitioner including via text or social media
- Staying away from the usual places petitioner is at such as home, work or school
- Prohibit stalking, or surveillance of any kind
- In situations where they lived together, provide custody or access to
- Children
- Pets
- Important documents
- Personal items such as clothes, medications, cell phones
- Cars
- Extending the protections to others living with the petitioner
Research findings on benefits of restraining orders
Here’s the top three findings from a study on domestic violence and restraining orders from the University of New Hampshire
Reduce Violence
Civil protective orders (such as a DVRO) are effective in reducing partner violence for many women. For half the women in the sample, a protective order stopped the violence. For the other half, the orders significantly reduced violence and abuse.
Cost Effective
They are a relatively low-cost solution, particularly when compared with the social and personal costs of partner violence.
Urban Vs. Rural
The impact of civil protective orders on reducing violence and abuse did not differ for rural and urban women. In rural areas where resources and services for partner violence may be more limited, the restraining orders hold greater importance.
What Restraints can I ask when I file for a Restraining Order
Here are the typical restrictions places on the abuser via the restraining order.
Stay Away From You
Abuser would have to stay at least 100 yards away from you, your children and locations you request such as your work
Not To Contact You
Not to contact you via phone or text or mutual friends
Not Stalk You
Not stalk you or your loved ones, including your accounts on facebook or other social media
Hand Over A Car
Get access to cars held by the abuser
Vacate The Shared Residence
The respondent can be asked to vacate the shared residence. You can also request help from police to kick them out.
Handover Passport, Cell Phone, Medications Etc.
You an ask for your personal items such as passport, medications, clothes. This would be applicable if you were living together up to now.
Don’t Post Intimate Images
Take down, delete, and do not distribute intimate images of a protected person
Restrict Abusive Litigation
This is to prevent the misuse of the legal system to harass, intimidate, or burden you.
Get Drugs, Mental Health And Sex Offender Treatment
You can request the abuser to seek treatment for alcoholism, drug use, domestic violence abuse
Risks of a Restraining Order
It is conceivable that following the submission of a civil protection order, the abuser particularly in domestic violence situations may react with anger due to the perceived loss of control over you and your household. In certain instances, the abuser may portray themselves as the victim and shift blame onto the actual victim they were mistreating.
The response of your abuser after the filing of a protection order is unpredictable. While a Domestic Violence Protection Order (DVPO) can provide legal protection, one should not automatically assume that it guarantees safety. The initial weeks post-filing can be particularly precarious, contingent on your abuser’s reaction.
Despite the safeguards intended by a DVPO, abusers may retaliate through various means, such as:
- Physical assault or violence
- Harming or taking away children
- Damaging jointly owned property
- Disregarding the order and persisting with threats, possibly through intermediaries
- Inflicting harm or causing harm to pets
- Harassing your loved ones for information
- Engaging in stalking behavior
- Initiating a retaliatory restraining order against you
- Spreading false information about you in court documents, online, or publicly
Following the submission of a domestic violence Protection order, it’s important to continuously assess your situation and prepare for the potential escalation of your case into more violent territory.
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