Recently updated on March 11th, 2025 at 08:31 pm

Overview

Emotional stress  is generally includes both negative affect, such as anxiety and distress, as well as a cascade of physiological responses associated with the stress-response system.

In California while causing emotional stress is not a crime i.e. cannot report to the police. However, emotional harm is a kind of harassment, and provides grounds for getting a restraining order.

Online Harassment: Making rude, offensive, or suggestive comments online

Catfishing: Using manipulative tactics, such as luring someone into a relationship, to harm them

Impersonation: Posting comments on social media or in chat rooms in the victim’s name

Monitoring: Installing a recording or monitoring device on the victim’s computer or smartphone to save their  keystrokes

  Spoofing: Disguising the content of a link, email, text message, or display name to trick the receiver into giving away sensitive information

  Phishing: Deceptively posing as a trustworthy source to trick people into giving away personal or financial information

Request a Restraining Order

You can request for a restraining order against a person you suspect is stalking you. You can ask for the restraining order by itself only, or in addition to the criminal case i.e. you can do both.

There are two types of restraining orders and the appropriate one depends on your relationship with the stalker.

Domestic Violence Restraining Order (DVRO)

DVRO is the appropriate type of restraining order if the stalker is someone who you:

• dated or
• had an intimate relationship with, including a spouse or domestic partner or someone with whom you’ve a child or
• is a relative such a parent sibling or grandparent

The general process is the same across California, however the court location, some of the official forms required to apply for a restraining order and hours of operation are specific to your county (not your city or zip code)

Civil Harassment Restraining Order (CHRO)

If the stalker is not related to you in the ways that make DVRO the appropriate choice, then for all other relationships e.g. total stranger, a neighbor, a co-worker etc. — the appropriate choice is a Civil Harassment Restraining Order.

The general process is the same across California, however the court location, some of the official forms required to apply for a restraining order and hours of operation are specific to your county (not your city or zip code)

Evidence Needed for Restraining Orders

So if you suspect you’re being stalked you can start organizing the evidence which you can submit with the initial petition and then again at a court hearing.

1. Pending Criminal Case:  Judges are also more likely to issue an order if there is an ongoing criminal case, therefore it’s important to call such cases out when seeking a temporary restraining order, including any police report filed. When a judge sees that there’s a criminal case happening, they might think it means the police or the district attorney are pretty sure they can prove the crime happened, and that strengthens your claims.
2. Photos of stalking:  These are the most common types of evidence submitted. These can be photos of victim’s injuries inflicted by the abuser. It is helpful to add photos next to the related incident description to help create a complete picture for the judge.
3. Print outs of messages, emails or transcripts of voicemail: You can take screenshots of text messages and attach them. Similarly you can print emails and attach them as pictures or PDF files. While in most cases you cannot submit digital files such as
4. 911 Calls reporting the stalking: Rather than just saying you called 911 or any specific hotline, you can make your case stronger by listing the following items
   • The number dialed in case of the domestic hotline
   • The date and time (or approximate date and time) when the call was made
   • Who made the call
   • What was reported on the call
   • Any specific details of the person who answer the 911 call e.g. male/female voice
5. Records from Hospital or Psychologist: If you talked about the stalking to a professional, a school counselor, a shrink or a therapist, you can have them issue a record of that conversation to serve as written evidence. These could be hospital visit records, print outs from your hospital portal (E.g. mychart) showing details of your visit.
6. Police reports: You can attach a copy of the police reports filed against abuser for domestic violence.
7. Testimony from a Witness:  A testimony is a formal written or spoken statement, especially one given in a court of law. The witness can be anyone such as a family member, neighbor a co-worker or a bystander. The testimony is just an essay written describing the incidents witnessed, with as many specifics as possible.

Resources for Stalking Victims

Victims can talk to “advocates” who can talk to you, understand your situation, and provide you with personal safety and legal information.  These services are provided by State and Federal agencies without any charge, and without any concern about your legal immigration status in United States, so its very helpful to talk to them.

Here are some examples of Victim Services provided by the District Attorney’s Office at Each county:

Los Angeles: Cities: Los Angeles (city), Long Beach , Santa Clarita Glendale Lancaster Palmdale and so on

San Diego: Cities: San Diego (city), Chula Vista, Oceanside, Escondido, Carlsbad and so n

Orange:  Cities: Anaheim, Santa Ana, and Irvine and so on

Riverside

San Bernardino County

Santa Clara County

Alameda County Family Justice Center  for cities: Oakland, Fremont, Berkeley, Dublin-Pleasanton-Livermore, Hayward.

Contra Costa

Fresno 

Kern

Process for getting a restraining order

Step 1: Gather Evidence

The first step is to gather the evidence to support your case. The fallowing are considered as evidence of domestic violence

Evidence Type 1: Pending Criminal Case

Judges are also more likely to issue an order if there is an ongoing criminal case, therefore it’s important to call such cases out when seeking a temporary restraining order.

When a judge sees that there’s a criminal case happening, they might think it means the police or the district attorney are pretty sure they can prove the crime happened.

Examples of evidence are:

Evidence Type 2: Photos of violence, injuries, damage

These are the most common types of evidence submitted. These can be photos of victim’s injuries inflicted by the abuser. It is helpful to add photos next to the related incident description to help create a complete picture for the judge.

Evidence Type 3: Print outs of messages, emails or transcripts of voicemail

You can take screenshots of text messages and attach them. Similarly you can print emails and attach them as pictures or PDF files. While in most cases you cannot submit digital files such as

Evidence Type 4: 911 Calls

Rather than just saying you called 911 or any specific hotline, you can make your case stronger by listing the following items

• The number dialed in case of the domestic hotline
• The date and time (or approximate date and time) when the call was made
• Who made the call
• What was reported on the call
• Any specific details of the person who answer the 911 call e.g. male/female voice

Evidence Type 5:  Medical Records

.You can attach documentation of previous medical emergencies or injuries that resulted from the actions of the abuser. These could be hospital visit records, print outs from your hospital portal (E.g. mychart) showing details of your visit.

Evidence Type 6:  Police reports

You can attach a copy of the police reports filed against abuser for domestic violence.

Evidence Type 7:  Testimony

• A testimony from a witness. The witness can be anyone such as a family member, neighbor a co-worker or a bystander. The testimony is just an essay written describing the incidents witnessed, with as many specifics as possible.

Step 2: Get a copy of court forms

In order to apply for a civil protection order, you need to fill and submit a specific set of official California court forms. These have questions aimed at understanding your situation and the people involved.

1. DV-100 Request for Domestic Violence Restraining Order (DV-100). This is the main form, though a few are required to be able to file the case which is the first step.
2. CLETS-001 Confidential CLETS Information The information on this form will help police enforce your restraining order. The court will not use the information on this form and the person you want a restraining order against will not get a copy.
3. DV-109 Notice of Court Hearing
4. DV-110 Temporary Restraining Order
5. FL-150 Income and Expense Declaration This form if you are asking for attorney’s fees, spousal support, or child support. This form asks how much money you earn and what your expenses are. Attach proof of your income (like paystubs) from the past two months to the form.
6. DV-120 Response to Request for Domestic Violence Restraining Order
7. DV-200  Proof of Personal Service (CLETS)

If you have children together, and also want child custody, parenting time, or child support orders:

8. DV-105 Request for Child Custody and Visitation Orders  Ask the judge for custody orders if you have children with the person you want a restraining order against.

DV-140 Child Custody and Visitation Order: On form DV-140, complete items 1 and 2 and the judge will complete the rest of this form. If you are asking for the parent to be supervised during their visits with your child, you will also need form DV-150. Complete items 1 and 2 on form DV-150 and the judge will complete the rest of this form.

DV-108  Request for Order: No Travel With Children:  If you believe that the other parent may take your child without your permission, you can ask the court to protect against this. To ask a judge for orders to prevent child abduction, you must complete form DV-108.  This form is optional because you do not have to ask for these orders if you want to ask for custody.

DV-145: On form DV-145, complete items 1 and 2. If the judge grants your request, the judge will complete the rest of this form and include it with form DV-110. This form is optional because you do not have to ask for these orders if you want to ask for custody.

The complete set of documents is at the California Courts website. While these forms are used in most courts, certain courts use modified versions of these forms, and its important to uses those versions.

Tip: You can check your local court’s website to see the exact versions and set of court forms needed. You need to prepare these forms. Courts also offers a free self help center where you can take forms. Alternatively you can use a free website such as LegalAtoms to prepare the restraining orders paperwork online.

Nothing happens until you file the forms. So its a good idea to step through the forms even if you think you don’t plan to file for a protection order right now, to get

You can then file them online when you’ve thought through all aspects.  There are special protections for victims, and you’re protected even if your immigration status is undocumented in United States.

Step 3: File the Court Forms

The process of submitting  your case documents is called filing. It involves delivering your case documents to the court, then the clerk reviews that they are correct and complete, and accepts them, at which point the case if officially filed. Details are covered at the beginning of this article.

Identify the court at your county

In California, one typically file at the Superior Court at county of your residence or where the abuse occurred. For example, if you live in San Francisco city, then the Superior Court of California, County of San Francisco.  There can be many special cases and fine print but that is the most common case. Please consult a lawyer if your situation is uncommon e.g. the abuser is overseas or you are overseas and the abuser is in California.

Correct location

Within the Superior Court of a county, there may be one location such as Superior Court of San Francisco OR multiple locations such as the one in San Bernardino, and each court has it’s own system so that you must file at the correct location.

For example here are some of the locations of the Superior Courts in California at San Bernardino County which are

• Barstow District: 235 East Mountain View Street Barstow, CA 92311
• Fontana District: Fontana District: 17780 Arrow Boulevard Fontana, CA 92335
• Joshua Tree District: 6527 White Feather Road Joshua Tree, CA 92252
• Needles District: 1111 Bailey Ave Needles, CA 92363
• Rancho Cucamonga District: 8303 Haven Avenue Rancho Cucamonga, CA 91730
• Victorville District: 14455 Civic Drive Victorville, CA 92392
• San Bernardino District: 351 North Arrowhead Avenue San Bernardino CA 92415

Methods of Filing

Method # 1: In Person:

Your court location would accept the forms to be submitted in person at the court hours.

Tip: All courts have lunch hours when they are closed for an hour

When you submit your case documents at the court, typically you take 3 copies.

The clerks reviews it, and if everything is ok, they formally enter it into the court system and put a stamp near the top of the documents. That acceptance is called filing.

The stamp may look something like this:

Method # 2:  Electronically via a portal

Some counties now have one or more online portals where you create an account for free, and then you can upload documents and hit submit. You will be required to pay around $5-$10 filing fees.

Method # 3:  Via another person 

Some counties accept filing via a friend or legal courier. These companies or individuals charge a flat or hourly fee and file the documents at the court.

Step 4: Get a Temporary Order

Depending on the facts and evidence presented, a Judge can issue a restraining order with immediate effect until the hearing, called an Emergency Temporary Order.  In relatively less risky situations, a temporary order is issued in a few days.

If there are no grounds or if the application is incomplete or the jurisdiction is incorrect the application may be rejected.

The temporary order is only valid for about 3 weeks which is the amount of time until the hearing. If the hearing is delayed for any reason, you need to check with the court to ensure the temporary order is renewed until the hearing.

Step 5: Serve the abuser

If you were successful in getting a temporary order only then this step is necessary, otherwise you will have to wait until you get one.

In the California legal system system, whenever one party initiates a restraining order it needs to inform or serve the other party formally by delivering the court documents. That step is called serving the respondent, and is often seen in movies and TV shows as “You’ve been served”.

Under the California law there are multiple ways in which the other party can be served.

 You cannot  serve your papers yourself.

Option 1:  Ask a Cop (FREE)

A sheriff or marshal can serve the opposing party for you which is a big help. This service is offered for FREE. You will however need the address of the abuser. To ask the sheriff to serve your papers, you must have an address or location for the other side (restrained person). If the other side is in jail, the sheriff can serve them. If the other side is in prison in California, prison staff, not the sheriff, will serve your papers. Follow the instructions by the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation for serving someone in prison

Option 2: Ask a friend, relative or any adult (FREE)

You ask someone you know to be your server

• 18 or over, and
• not part of your case

Think about safety when choosing your server. Get step-by-step instructions for how to have someone else, not the sheriff, serve your court papers.

Option 3: Hire a specialized courier

You can also hire a courier called professional process server. You can search on Yelp or Google to get a list of options near you. Yelp Example . An example is ABC Legal Services.

You cannot hire regular couriers such as UPS, FedEx or US Postal Service unless in exceptional scenarios where the judge authorizes service by mail, but that’s a whole different topic altogether.

Step 6: Present Evidence in a Court Hearing

Attend a hearing: The court holds a hearing within a couple of weeks where the evidence is examined. If there is sufficient supporting evidence as determined by a Judge, a full restraining order is issued. At this point it becomes a crime for the abuser to break the conditions of the restraining order.

Step 7. Collect the Final Order

After the hearing, a final order may be issued. You can take a paper copy of the order with you. The order is typically valid for five years.

Costs

There are no costs associated with a Domestic Violence Restraining Order.

• FREE forms : You can get the court forms for free, or prepare them using the guided experience below.
• FREE filing: There is fees for filing. Online filing platforms may charge a service fees

Process Duration

You can get a temporary protection order the same day as you file.

Courts can have a cutoff of around 2 p.m.  for the same day service, so you need to file before then. Otherwise, the order would be issued the following day when courts open.

Courts are generally open Monday-Friday and closed on Saturday-Sunday.

The temporary order is valid until a formal hearing is held in which both parties need to be present. Typically a hearing is scheduled in 2 weeks of filing.

At the hearing a formal order may be issued

Comparison: Criminal Case Vs. Restraining Order option 

• Parties: A criminal cases involves a crime, and the legal case (charges etc.) is led by the a government lawyer, called a prosecutor and the case is e.g. State of California Vs. Your Stalker. So it offers some benefits to to the victim as they are not the ones driving the case.  Restraining order cases would be between you and the stalker
• Purpose: In restraining order cases, you can seek certain restrictions on the abuser. In criminal cases, the purpose is to punish the defendant for committing a crime i.e. monetary fine or imprisonment.
• Severity:  Restraining order restrictions usually involve staying away, and not contacting. If the restraining order is between coparents then it also has a big effect on child custody and visitation. Criminal penalties can be much more severe and may include jail time, probation, legal fees, loss of rights, and a criminal record.
• Burden of proof: In criminal cases, the prosecution has a higher burden of proof than the plaintiff in civil cases because of the serious consequences of a criminal conviction.